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Use this acronym to plan what you'll say before tough conversations. THINK is an acronym that stands for the 5 things any constructive criticism should be: True, Helpful, Inspiring, Necessary, and Kind. If what you have to say meets all 5 criteria, it's unlikely the person you're talking to will be hurt by it.
Focus on your own beliefs rather than pointing at the other person. When someone feels as though you're blaming them for something, their defenses are likely to go up. This happens either because you've said something hurtful or the person is worried that you will. Framing your own perspective leaves room for the other person's perspective as well.
Boost the other person with compliments to inspire them to step up. If you tell someone what they're doing right, it encourages them to go the extra mile to fix anything you might have a problem with. You leave them with the sense that they're capable of improving on their results.
This approach lets the person know what to do in the future. Pointing out what someone did wrong is often not necessary. What is necessary is making sure they don't do the same thing again, and you can often accomplish this without criticizing them for something negative they did.
Offering specific, actionable feedback empowers the person to change it. Give the person something they can work on without insulting their personality or their character. Blaming a personality trait is an easy way out that will only hurt the person and won't solve your problem.
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